Attitude of Gratitude

Apparently, I need to be more grateful. Why, you ask? Because I have had numerous discussions at work from our principal broker, I've read several books recently that have mentioned it, and on Sunday our entire sacrament meeting was dedicated to it. So apparently, I need to keep hearing it.

Now, don't get me wrong......I love this topic. I have a testimony of how gratitude positively affects our lives. I firmly believe that gratitude helps us constantly focus on the positive aspects of our lives. At the beginning of last year, we started doing Thankful Journals (inspired by President Eyring's journal). We didn't end up doing it every day or even weekly, but I've still been trying to write during sacrament each week.

In fact, at work, we write down 10 things we are grateful for and then 10 goals. The best part about doing this frequently is that I don't feel very thorough if I just write down 'husband' or 'kids' or 'gospel'. I now write things that are very specific like 'a husband who has a job with great benefits' or 'kids who are excited about my success' or 'having a foundation of values that ground me and my family'.

So here are a few things that are always on my list:

1. I am grateful for the love and support my family gives me.
2. I am grateful for the excitement my kids show regarding my success in real estate.
3. I am grateful for my testimony in Jesus Christ that I know I can be forgiven of my sins if I ask for that forgiveness.
4. I am grateful for a work environment that is positive and wants me to be successful both in real estate and in life.
5. I am grateful for cars that are working.
6. I am grateful for a home that keeps me and my family warm this winter.
7. I am grateful for my current clients.
8. I am grateful for my leads.
9. I am grateful for books and CDs that help me to culture an attitude of self-improvement and an appreciation for what I do have.
10. I am grateful that I understand how gratitude affects me in a positive way every day.

Hmmm - Could this be our Purpose?

As I mentioned before, I've been thinking about my motivation for doing hard things and what my (our) purpose is right now. In other words, what is it that drives me to make a decision one way or another (like getting out of bed in the morning or doing something a little uncomfortable at work)?

After the kids are grown, I'm sure it will change. But for now, I want to raise my kids to want to serve others and share the gospel. It's something that we've talked a lot with our kids about and started finding ways we can act along with that teaching. The kids have shoveled walks, we donate to Sub for Santa at our work places, we've given from our home to families in need, and we help when asked to help at church, school, or in our community.

But, I kind of want to take it to the next level. I want them to know that there is more than just little things that people are in need of. Like homes, clothing, clean water, healthy environment, etc. So, that's what we are going to focus on.

Sidenote: I have this amazing friend. She has even stated that she's a 'gypsy.' Well, I fell in love with her and her outlook on life the first time I heard her talk in sacrament. And subsequently have loved all the new things she is constantly trying out. I still need to 'stretch' in order to fulfill that, but she has really inspired me to look outside of the norm and seek new things.

On that note, at some point I was talking to a co-worker about the possibilities that would be open to us if we didn't have debt of any kind. What could you do if you only had to have $25,000/year to cover your necessities?

Think about it ..... work a job, any job, for nine months out of the year. Make sure you have enough to cover your needs for twelve months. Then what would you do?

Well, I want to teach my kids service by having them live it. So what programs are out there? After Leon and I talked through this in a lot of depth throughout January, I spent 30 minutes or so researching on the internet. And I found two programs that will allow our family to spend 2-12 weeks on a volunteer vacation in other countries. I know there are more out there too. I'm giddy right now over what we could do.

Not that we could drop everything right now and leave next week, but now I have a goal in mind and can layout a two or three year plan. I already knew I wanted to pay off all my debt, but now I know what I can do once that is done. Something that might drive me to get it done faster if I have the chance. Something that will make a difference in my life and my families lives.

What would you do if you only had to have $25,000 for your necessities and then could save up $25,000 for something else each year? Oh, the possibilities!

Purpose in Life

Have you ever wondered what your purpose in life is? I've been thinking about that a lot over the last month or so.

1. What legacy am I supposed to leave my kids?
2. What feeds my soul now and after my kids are grown?
3. What will my imprint be on the world after I am gone?

At work, we talk a lot about motivation. What motivates you to do things you do each day? Of course, I want to provide for my kids and have a wonderful relationship with my husband. I enjoy learning about the gospel and continuing to grow my relationship with Jesus Christ. I love, love, love learning new things. I really love watching my kids learn new things or fall in love with something new.

Funny enough, when I watched Annie I always wanted to help with orphans. You know "the old lady that lives in a shoe, had so many children she didn't know what to do". Yeah, kind of like that. Leon corresponded with the ambassador to Zimbabwe through high school and fell in love with that country. Ever since we dated, we've talked about philanthropy and serving.

So, when you feel a little down and out, and don't want to accomplish the tasks for the day, what do you tell yourself to get going?

I'm excited to figure out what mine is, you know, really figure it out.

2011 Goals

As a family, we focused on three 'pillars' of our life where we can set goals:

Relationships

Work/School

Health

It was really great what I saw my kids come up with. Here are my goals:

Relationships

1. Find joy in kids and their happiness
2. Focus on finding balance for myself so I can love others
3. Genuinely take an interest in others and get to know them

Work

1. Consistently call prospects
2. Follow up better with clients and leads
3. Practice learning scripts to increase comfort level with prospects, clients and leads

Health

1. Drink more water
2. Exercise multiple times a week
3. Plan menus and stick to them

I'm excited about the possibilities!

I'm NOT Disciplined!

Not necessarily what I wanted to know about myself, but yeah, I'm not. BUT, I want to be. I want to be the person who reads their scriptures every night and says their daily prayers ....... because they want to. I want to be the person that is good at saying "No" to their favorite food because you've already had too many calories for the day. I want to be the one that wants to get up every morning to do the things that you know will make your life better.

Silly .... stupid, one might even say .... and why? Why don't I want to do these things? Why don't I want to make exercise a part of my day because I'll feel better about myself today and for the rest of my life (if I keep it up)? Why don't I enjoy cooking healthy meals for my family each night because it's good for us? Why don't I see the benefits each day of disciplining myself?

Well .... here are a few reasons why:

1. I really like brownies.....I mean a LOT! And one week a month, I crave them like crazy!
2. I love, Love, LOVE to sleep in. I don't what it is about this one indulgence that makes me feel so wonderful about waking up when my body say "time to wake up" instead of doing it to an alarm clock (or sometimes one of our children asking for something).
3. I want to be spontaneous. This one is interesting for me. I want to be the person that packs the family up and drives off the weekend just because we have an extra day off. But then I don't find the energy to do so .... so I want to, but I'm not.
4. I don't want to have to do anything. I want to want to do whatever it is I'm doing. (Does that make sense?)

Last year at the end of May, I quit my job in software. I thought "no big deal." I can make real estate work around my schedule and cover the gap in bills that was necessary. Can I tell you how wonderful our summer was together? We played and vacationed and just spent time together. And I didn't do real estate.

No big deal ... when the kids are back in school I'll just get into a schedule and get it going. Well, apparently that was a big deal because I couldn't do it. Even after we started to get behind on bills and couldn't quite make things work with the money we had, I didn't get disciplined enough. This put a lot of strain on our marriage and consequently our entire family started to feel the pain.

So, when I got a phone call from a local brokerage to come in and talk to them about what they offer, I thought "why not?" I'm always looking for new things I can incorporate into my business/life. Well, what a change it was and I was so attracted to it that I switched brokerages.

This brokerage is like nothing else I've seen before. They are so positive and are genuinely interested in my success. THEY want ME to SUCCEED! They put all their efforts into creating an environment where I can be successful. And what do they ask in return? They want me to listen to positive speakers, surround myself with positive people, come into the office and generate new business, all on my own schedule! In fact, they want to make sure that I don't take anything away from my family in doing all of this.

How many of you can say that you work for a company that does that? Or if you don't work outside of the home, do you have a relationship with someone that does this for you? I can tell you that I didn't before this ..... and this has changed my whole perspective. And it's even changing Leon's perspective because I'm sharing so much with him.

Anyway, how does this relate to being disciplined? I am now expected to have a schedule and be accountable for what I do with that schedule. I can't believe how much time I had that I was doing nothing with.....no wonder I was unhappy and not feeling successful.

Now my goals for 2011 are going to be to make sure I'm making time to exercise, to cook for the family, to spend time with my husband, to make time for myself, to plan healthier menus, to stick to a budget, to make myself the best me that I can. And I can! I can totally do this.

How about you? What have you done to make time for something you love to do? What is changing for you in 2011?

Home Organization (and Dejunking)

So, we seem to have an issue of not taking of 'stuff' as it comes into the house. Therefore, it tends to get stuck in corners and edges of rooms and stacked on counters and shelves. Which I absolutely hate! Have you seen Labrynth? Do you remember when she is being 'brainwashed' through the dancing dream and ends up in her bedroom. An old lady comes in and starts reminding her of all her 'stuff' that she just loves. When she refuses to forget about her brother and then all the walls start caving in with stuff from a junkyard........long story to describe the feeling I get when we get too much 'stuff' in our house and it doesn't get organized. The stuff just starts caving in on me.

So, I joined a 21 day organization challenge found at this blog:

I have yet to really get on board, but I'm trying! Some of the stuff I've already done and some I desperately need to do. It's Saturday today .... my goal is to get some of this done.

Oh, and I also want to paint my living room a delicious shade of yellow. AND make some furniture from www.ana-white.com. I have no idea when I'll get that done! But here's to a new year and new goals!

This Saved Our Lives

Do you remember the day when you were going crazy because you couldn't get all of your commitments done? And I don't mean all the ones outside of the home, but just commitments as a mom - like clean bathrooms, laundry, dinner on the table, kids lessons, etc. Was it today, yesterday or what you expect tomorrow to be where you see yourself on your knees cleaning up whatever it is on the floor, trying to get through mounds of dishes, make a healthy dinner, listen to one (or more) kids reading, helping them with homework, smile for your husband coming home, oh, and trying to keep a positive attitude for yourself. Yeah - I was there. And guess what? I wasn't succeeding - in absolutely no way, shape or form.

I had a previous manager that had 10 kids - 8 boys, 2 girls. And he gave me the secret......are you ready for it? The Parenting Breakthrough by Merillee Boyack.

Holy cow! This book is amazing and it literally saved our lives. By saving my sanity as a mom so that I could be there for my kids in a supportive, nurturing way instead of always being stressed - or just living in a complete mess.

Today:

• Our 12-year-old is now doing our laundry (we have a few pink whites, but it's a lesson taught/learned). This is our third rotation, so he knows how to clean bathrooms - inside and outside of the toilet and all, clean up kitty litter, wash dishes - clean the kitchen floor and all, and take out the garbage and recycle. He also knows how to make his bed and clean up his room (mostly).
• Our 10-year-old is now cleaning our bathrooms (inside and outside of the toilet and all) and taking out the garbage and recycle. After our third rotation, he also knows how to clean bathrooms, wash dishes - clean the kitchen floor and all, and wash our clothes. He doesn't do the kitty litter because he is allergic to the cats, so he is our entire house garbage taker-outer. He is also responsible for his bed and room.
• Our 9-year-old has also been in on the full rotations. He is learning the kitchen at the moment and has some 'training' to continue with, but he is trying and he does a good job. He also makes his bed and takes care of his room.
• Our 7-year-old is in charge of cleaning out the kitty litter and setting the table (of course not at the same time because that is disgusting). He already mastered organizing the shoes each day - what a simple thing, but it helped so much. He is pretty good at making his bed and picking everything up in his room as long as he has encouragement.
• Our 5-year-old now organizes the shoes and we are still working on getting her bed made and picking up her clothes/toys. We really have to work on motivation for her - she specifically likes to have someone doing it with her. I'm thinking about job-sharing partners (I saw it on Super Nanny once) to get her to complete her chores consistently.

Our last rotation, we had each of the kids 'train' their brothers on how to do the job. It was pretty great to watch them take pride in what they learned and teach it. We also noticed what the kids missed and probably what should be reviewed with them.

What I like about the approach in the book is that it is all about creating self-sufficient, independent adults. I hear awful stories about kids on missions or in college that have no idea how to cook or do their own laundry. I even heard a story about a woman whose mother came over and cleaned her house while her husband was at work. What!?! Flabbergasted!

The book gives specific breakdowns of what kids can do at what ages. Who thought a 3-year-old could make their own sandwiches? I didn't. But show them how and see them light up. It's pretty cool. It also goes over things that I didn't even think of teaching the kids because I was never taught them.

I'm excited to continue to watch my children grow and subsequently learning some of these things ourselves. :o)